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KATY PERRY UNDERWATER OPTICAL ILLUSION TITS

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Pop star Katy Perry splashed into the cool clear water while vacationing in Italy, and the Blogosphere focused on one picture in particular. It appears to show Katy’s bikini top slipped up and her tits floating out underneath below the water. We are normally skeptical, especially when the mainstream media has published the picture and not blurred out the tits in the picture, but we have to agree with the Blogosphere on this one. It looks like Katy’s tits are definitely out. But it could just be an optical illusion from the waves or ripples in the water. We are sticking with tits out.

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ELIZABETH HURLEY ERECTION CANDY, DESPITE PASSING 50

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There aren’t many former sex symbols who continue to symbolize sexy after reaching 50. They mostly fade into obscurity before we hear about their tragic death from an overdose or some other drug- or alcohol-related organ failure. It is what Hollywood has taught us for the past century. But Elizabeth Hurley is still marketing her own formula for erectile dysfunction. She recently posted two hot as fuck, dick hardening bikini pictures to Instagram, that really make you rethink whether vampires exist and she’s just sucking the blood from the bodies of young girls to keep her looks. We haven’t fully invested into the vampire theory, but we are still mulling it over as we look at the pictures. She captioned one, “Someone has to do it,” while holding a running hose while wearing a pair of sunglasses and a plunging purple one-piece. That she can still “do it” at 52 is impressive to say the least.

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THE INCONCLUSIVE SISTINE STALLONE UPSKIRT

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Once the Stallone girls were trotted out in front of the world at the Oscars, they became fair celebrity game. And the game today is whether you can or cannot make out Sistine Stallone’s vagina through what appear to be black sheer panties in her recent upskirt shots (right click and the open the picture below for a larger version). There are times when we see labia and times when we don’t. This debate has raged on for hours like a bad case of Herpes. We have decided to shine some light on it and let you decide for yourself.

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IN CANADA, SEX WITH MINORS IS NOT A CRIME AS LONG AS YOU REASONABLY ASSUME THEY’RE ADULTS. YOU DON’T EVEN HAVE TO ASK THEIR AGE.

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Statutory rape in the United States is a raw deal, but it is a hard line that we don’t cross. You fuck a kid, you go to jail. It’s easy. Don’t fuck kids. But of course it happens all the time. And so people go to jail all the time. Maybe they deserve it. But in Canada, land of affordable prescription meds and moose beer, as long as you make a reasonable assumption that the person is over the age of consent, you are in the clear. That’s what the Supreme Court of Canada said in agreeing with a trial judge who acquitted a 35-year-old woman of sexual assault charges for having sex with a 14-year-old boy. Barbara George got off (twice) because, the trial judge found the sexual activity was “factually consensual,” meaning she honestly believed the boy was at least 16, and there was reasonable doubt she had not taken all reasonable steps to determine the age of the boy. But here’s the kicker: Barbara never asked the boy how old he was. The Supreme Court said “reasonable steps” is open-ended language and that determining age is a “highly contextual, fact-specific exercise.”

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It was good enough that Barbara assumed the boy was over the age of 16 because he had facial hair, a mature demeanour and apparent sexual experience. He also smoked and took care of his younger siblings. The Supreme Court said, “In some cases, it may be reasonable to ask a partner’s age. It would be an error, however, to insist that a reasonable person would ask a partner’s age in every case. Conversely, it would be an error to assert that a reasonable person would do no more than ask a partner’s age in every case, given the commonly recognized motivation for young people to misrepresent their age.” Well, we can’t exactly say we’ll miss the horny old cougars packing their bags for Canada on that news.



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JOY CORRIGAN STILL A JOY

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Most of the time we find ourselves talking about Joy Corrigan it is for her swimsuit work, mostly in Sports Illustrated. But Joy keeps a diverse portfolio. She was recently nude (but covered) for Gosee magazine. Cause she’s multi-talented. And we likes that.

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INSTAGRAM MODEL BRISSA DOMINGUEZ-GARCIA TOWEL WHIPPED AND MULE KICKED POLICE AS THEY TRIED TO ARREST HER NAKED

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Brissa Dominguez-Garcia was arrested last week in Clearwater, Florida, butt naked. Police were called to the Edge Hotel after reports of a disturbance around 4.30 a.m. That disturbance was a naked Brissa. Cops tried to help her out by handing her a towel to cover herself, but she used it as a whip, striking the officer in the face with it. The officer wrote in the arrest report: “While investigating a trespass I found the defendant to be nude. I handed her a towel to cover herself. She used said towel to strike me in the face by swinging it in a whipping motion.” So of course the officers then arrested her. But Brissa still was not in a cooperating mood. She tried to mule kick the officers. According to the report, “Upon her arrest the defendant intentionally kicked myself and other officers. She kicked me as I stood in front of her, and also in a mule kick when behind her while attempting to effect an arrest during difficult circumstances.” Brissa was also accused of trying to bit and spit on the officers. She’s out of the pokey now, though, cause she’s back on Instagram.

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ANA BRAGA BODY SHEER BLACK BIKINI AND BEACH

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Brazilian model Ana Braga has been drumming up media attention and publicity lately with more semi-nude beach shots. And while it is hard to call her an aging bikini model at 35, she is aged, though in her prime in the MILF market. Ana was doing a bit more drumming recently in Malibu with a body sheer black bikini, which mildly showcased her breasts in front and definitely showcased her ass in back.

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PORNLAND LINKS

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SINN & SKINN.com’s Pornland Links provide additional news, stories, pictures, videos and porn stars from around the web…


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DENISE FAGERBERG

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Denise Fagerberg, 23, as best as we can tell, was a Swedish glamour model with super huge 30F breasts. Her page is gone, and we can’t find much more on Denise, except the treasure trove of topless pictures she left behind. Wherever you are Denise, we are thankful for the little time you shared.

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BRANDI GLANVILLE TESTIFIES ABOUT JOANNA KRUPA’S SMELLY PUSSY, AND THAT IS WHY THE AMERICAN COURT SYSTEM IS THE BEST

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Real Housewives of Miami star Brandi Glanville was sued by co-star Joanna Krupa over her comments that Joanna’s “pussy smelled.” That is old news. But the case has continued and Brandi recently testified in a deposition by Joanna’s lawyers to answer for the smelly pussy comments. And Brandi had a lot to say about Joann’s pussy, according to transcripts obtained by TMZ. Brandi said that she “didn’t say anything that I knew to be false,” when she talked about Joanna’s smelly pussy during a 2013 “Watch What Happens Live” appearance. Brandi also defended her comments as part of the reality show deal. Joanna’s lawyer asked, “Do you think that means you can say things like her pussy smells?” Brandi replied, “Well, yeah.” (You could almost hear the “Boom Shock-a-Locka” in the background.).

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Brandi also said the “Housewives” contract bars cast members from suing each other, and that being on the show means dealing with “the good, the bad and the ugly that comes along with it.” Smelly pussy comments included. We have no idea whether Joanna’s pussy smells or not (though everybody’s junk smells some kind of way), though we wouldn’t mind finding out. Our only question is whether Joann’s pussy will be an exhibit in the trial?

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U.S. WOMEN’S HOCKEY TEAM NAKED FOR ESPN BODY ISSUE

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Sex, we mean six, women from the U.S. National Hockey Team stripped down for the ESPN body issue: Brianna Dekcer, Meghan Duggan, Jocelyne Lamoureux-Davidson, Monique Lamoureux-Morando, Kacey Bellamy and Alex Rigsby. Talking with ESPN about the misceptions about women hockey players, they hit the nail right on the head. At first even we had our doubts when we heard the U.S. Women’s Hockey team was getting naked. One of the Lamoureux-Morando twins said, “You run into people at the airport who ask what sport you play, and they’re like, ‘Oh, I thought you’d be bigger.’ Or ‘You look really petite, and you have all your teeth.’ We’re normal women. We like to be feminine. We love to get dressed up and be pretty. But we love to train and be strong and be aggressive. There’s this misconception that, if we play ice hockey, we’re a certain way off the ice. We’re normal.” Meghan added, “From a muscular standpoint, we’re strong women. We have big legs and big butts. It’s all about acceleration, explosion, power; it’s all about the glutes. We’re not size 0s, but we’re proud of our greatest assets, which are our legs and our butts. We want to be fast. We want to be strong. We want to be dynamic and powerful and conditioned. All of us really represent that in a different way. Everyone brings a different piece to the table.” Big butts, indeed. We were actually surprised to see the U.S. women naked, though, we suspect they only took the six best.

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EMILY LANCE MADE THE MISTAKE OF POSTING A VIDEO OF HERSELF PEEING ON AN AMERICAN FLAG IN A TOILET BOWL, AND AMERICANS DIDN’T REACT TOO KINDLY

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Emily Lance has to be about the dumbest dumb fuck on the planet. She posted a video on Facebook of herself urinating on an American flag draped over her toilet bowl. She used a funnel to get every drop perfectly splashed across the flag, while enabling her to stand over it, and of course serve as a pseudo dick. She really laid it on thick, entitling her post, “Fuck your nationalism. Fuck your country. Fuck your stupid fucking flag.” Emily’s from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, by the way. People didn’t like it of course. Emily, being the dumb fuck she is, didn’t care. “Freedom (of speech/expression) means that I’m entitled to do and say as I please, EVEN if you don’t like it, so long as I am not physically hurting someone,” she posted. “And no, your precious feelings don’t count, that’s your own problem.” Well, it’s become Emily’s problem, as she has received death and rape threats. (You knew it was coming.). Emily continued to lash out. “People are willing to MURDER someone over a flag. It’s so sad that people don’t realize how brainwashed they are,” she wrote. “I’m gross for peeing on a symbol? LOOK AT YOURSELVES. You people epitomize all that is foul.” Oh but ain’t that America, for you and me / Ain’t that America, we’re something to see baby / Ain’t that America, home of the free, yeah / Little pink houses for you and me, oh for you and me. Who doesn’t love John Cougar Mellencamp? And when you fuck with the American flag, yeah baby, you’re gonna get a taste of America. Emily has since deleted her Facebook post, but that ain’t never going away.

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THE AMY SCHUMER SPREAD EAGLE BIKINI SHOT THAT NO ONE WANTED BUT WE ARE FORCED TO LOOK AT ANYWAY

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Comedian Amy Schumer almost broke the Internet with her nasty ass vagina spread eagle bikini shot in celebration of National Bikini Day. It was of course intended to be funny. Amy wrote with the post, “National bikini day! #wherewasmyparisfashionweekinvite”. Not everyone got the joke. But Amy is used to the criticism, because, well, she shouldn’t be showcasing herself in a bikini and she knows it. Amy covered the May issue of InStyle in a white one-piece, and swimwear designer Dana Duggan wrote, “Come on now! You could not find anyone better for this cover? Not everyone should be in a swimsuit,” on Instagram, adding a vomit emoji. Amy is still making people vomit, in the name of comedy and body positivity.

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PORNLAND LINKS

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NIPPLE TORTURE ENCORE

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We couldn’t end our nipple clamp fetish without going out with a bang. We feel we’ve accomplished that today.

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EMILY RATAJKWOSKI BLAMES HER TITS FOR NOT GETTING WORK, NOT THE FACT THAT SHE HAS NO OTHER TALENT

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Look, we gotta call this one straight. Emily Ratajkowski is basically a set of big tits and a hard to pronounce Eastern European sounding last name. Mostly, just the tits. In fact there would be no Emily Ratajkwoski without the tits. She is tits. That’s all she is. And the sad fact is that ain’t gonna change. Accept it, tits. Emily got famous because of her tits. And frankly, she doesn’t have much in the way of other talent. Like Kate Upton. But somehow, Emily sees her tits as a drawback. We are fucking astounded. In a recent interview for Harper’s Bazaar Australia’s July issue, Emily said, “There’s this thing that happens to me: ‘Oh, she’s too sexy.’ It’s like an anti-woman thing, that people don’t want to work with me because my boobs are too big. What’s wrong with boobs? They’re a beautiful feminine thing that needs to be celebrated. Like, who cares? They are great big, they are great small. Why should that be an issue?” In a similar vein, last year, Emily said, “If you’re a sexy actress it’s hard to get serious roles. You get offered the same thing that they’ve seen you in,” in Es magazine in May 2016. Maybe big tits and big tits celebrity-dom make you blind to the fact that you have no talent but big tits. Let’s be real. Emily’s no Meryl Streep. She’s not even Lindsay Lohan. Emily won’t be winning any Academy Awards no matter what roles she’s given. We all love Emily for only one thing: her tits. And love her we do. But stay in your lane, kid.

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