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PORN STAR CHERIE DEVILLE AND COOLIO “RUNNING” FOR PRESIDENT IN 2020

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Porn star Cherie Deville is running for president, with rapper Coolio as her vice president, with Khloe Terae and Kennedy Summers already part of her cabinet. Security will be run by WWE legend Virgil. Yes, it’s a stupid publicity stunt, to draw attention to a porn website (www.fuckingawesome.com). Yes, there is no way in hell Cherie has a chance of winning (though, we would have said that about Donald Trump only a few years back). But the porn star has at least started to differentiate herself from the president and offered ways in which she would put the United States back on the right path, depending on your politics. In an interview with the Daily Star Online, where all candidates go to launch their campaign, Cherie said, “The ways I would differ from President Trump are endless. I believe in immigration, and America being a land of opportunity. I’d say the largest difference between Donald Trump and myself is I have integrity.” As to international foreign policy, she said, “The regime in North Korea has been known for its aggressive rhetoric since the Korean war ended. All the Presidents before Trump have carefully used diplomacy to keep the Kim family at bay. With the advancements that Kim Jong-un has made in North Korea’s nuclear programme, verbally attacking and provoking him is not a smart move by the current administration. Avoiding nuclear war is my priority, not my ego.” Cherie has no chance of winning, as we said, but we wish her well. And Coolio too! Welcome back to the light buddy.

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PORN STAR CHERIE DEVILLE TEACHES OLD COUPLES HOW TO FUCK LIKE A PORN STAR

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We have to admit this video is like watching paint dry. It’s like watching porn, but without any tits, ass or sex. But it’s supposed to be educational, at least for a generation of geriatrics that are too conservative to just watch porn. But we are all about the educational, and watching paint dry can be a fucking amazing experience….on crystal meth (legal disclaimer: we do not endorse watching paint dry and doing crystal meth, we’re just saying). So this video from Trendzz and Brazzers brings “real moms together to learn complex positions such as the ‘Arc de Triomphe’, the ‘Piledriver’, and the ‘Erotic Accordion’ for Mother’s Day.” It features Brazzers “sexperts” Cherie DeVille and Charles Dera. And we warned you in advance…(but we added an extra couple nudes of Cherie to make this whole thing tolerable, that is, unless you are a conservative housewife who needs to learn a few things anyway).

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PORNSTARS DESCRIBE THEIR VAGINA

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Why you would ever need to ask a porn star to describe her vagina is beyond us. We’ve all seen them many, many, many times before. We know what each and every one of them looks like. But WoodRocket.com asked porn stars Brooklyn Chase, Alison Rey, Mocha Menage, Rizzo Ford, Jamine Webb, Aubrey Sinclair, Cassandra Cain, Lily Lane, Leya Falcon, Piper Perri, Amarna Miller, Charlotte Sartre, Abella Danger, Bobbi Dylan, Bella Doll, Jessie Lynne, Georgia Jones, Riley Reid, Harmony Cage, Cherie DeVille, and Riley Reyes to describe their vagina. The answers were actually kind of interesting. Brooklyn Chase said, “My vagina looks like Homer Simpson’s mouth.” Piper Perri described her pussy as “Turkey sandwich, all bun, hold the mayo.” And then words like “wet,” “tight” and “small” were thrown around a lot, like a lot. The best answer came from Riley Reyes, who said, “My vagina, like, like most vaginas, is framed by outer labia, and then there’s innie, inner labia, there kinda like this little pink ruffle dealie, and at the top there’s my clit, and ahh, then inside, I guess that’s the vulva, inside is the vagina, which is an awesome, wet, pink place where I like to put as many dicks as I can.” Riley Reyes, ladies and gentlemen.

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FUCK A WATERSLIDE, PORNHUB’S GOT THE WORLD’S LARGEST LUBESLIDE

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You might feel sticky after, but Pornhub just released video of its newest achievement, the World’s Largest Lubeslide. The Guinness Book of World Records hasn’t confirmed it, but it is a pretty big slide. And who would think to lube up their waterslide? Pornhub made a video, to promote their lubricants brands. We excuse the shameless self-promotion, because we like the concept. Pornhub invited porn stars Alix Lynx,Cherie Deville, Peta Jensen, Abigail Mac, Raven Bay, Rachel Roxxx, Alexis Fawx, Alex Grey and Blake Eden to break in the new lubeslide. Keep in mind though it is YouTube safe.

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