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SLEEPCUPID MADE A CELEBRITY FUCK LIST, AND YOU KNOW WHO’S ON TOP, KIM KARDASHIAN

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Sleep Cupid asked over 6,000 people around the world which celebrities they most want to sleep with, and made infographic charts for the United States, the United Kingdom, Canada, Europe, Brazil, Australia and New Zealand. In the United States, guessing the top seed that most guys wanted to seed was not hard, Kim Kardashian. The rest of the list seemed a bit outdated in our opinion, Scarlett Johansson made sense, but then Mila Kunis, Ariana Grande, Beyonce, Kelly Cuoco, and Sophia Vergara didn’t. We felt like Brazil had it closer to this decade, with Anitta, Juliana Paps, Fernanda Lima, Alessandra Ambrosio, and Adriana Lima. You can decide for yourself, though it makes some sense that the world would see things different on this one. Take the U.K., for example. Everyone wanted to fuck the future queen of England, Kate Middleton. Perhaps thinking they could get their seed into the royal line. Again, that made sense. But Emma Watson was another head scratcher. She is just fucking irritating. Margot Robbie toping the Australian chart made sense, but then Elle Macpherson, who is pushing 60 (she’s actually 52), who the hell is holding on to that 1980s crush. She’s like Kate Moss coming in at No. 6 in the U.K. It would be like Madonna for the U.S., but thankfully nobody said they still wanted to ride that party bus. We are left with more than a few questions about who Sleep Cupid polled, but it isn’t something that we’re going to focus on for very long.

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CHANEL WEST COAST GOES ALL NIPPLES AND ASS ON INSTAGRAM

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Chanel West Coast is Lil Wayne’s response to Iggy Azalea. Chanel is a white female rapper, who Wayne signed onto his Young Money Entertainment label back in 2012. She’s mostly released mixed tapes and singles. Unlike Ugly Azalea, Chanel is actually kinda hot, so score one for Lil Wayne at least on that front. On her Instagram page, Chanel is constantly promoting her brand. She recently dropped pictures in a skin tight gold one piece thong back, nipple piercing. So again, score one for Lil Wayne.

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SWEDISH STUDENT HANNA BOLANDER WENT TOPLESS IN HER HIGH SCHOOL YEARBOOK, CAUSE THAT’S SO EUROPE

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To review the week, we learned it is perfectly acceptable for a female student in Sweden to show her tits in a high school yearbook picture, and you will be arrested if you are a male student in the United States and you show your cock in your yearbook. Tits good. Cock bad. We like to keep things simple. While Hanna Bolander, 19, from Växjö, Sweden, did not get arrested for showing her tits in her yearbook, she is getting blowback and defending her decision, which she said she did to encourage a debate over public sexuality. “I just thought: Why shouldn’t I be able to do that if guys can take their tops off? It was kind of spontaneous but I do really care about these questions.” When her class suggested one of the girls go topless in a photo for the school yearbook, Hanna volunteered. She defended herself, as a feminist, saying she should be free to flash her tits as much as her male counterparts. She added that she had seen men with bigger breasts than hers, and they had never been asked to cover them. She continued her crusade on her blog, writing “In my opinion, women should have the right to show their breasts as publicly as boys. I think that everyone should have the right to decide for themselves. Blaming biology is a poor argument because there is no biological difference! Women are not objects, women are people. And by playing down the female body so that it is seen as just as natural as a man, so we have come a step closer to equality.” Wait, wait, women…..are human beings? Profound Hanna, profound. You had us, though, at women should be able to show their tits in public. We were sold on that concept long before you launched into a feminist monologue.


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IS THE NEXT NEW TREND TAKING MUSCLE RELAXERS FOR BETTER ORGASMS FOR WOMEN?

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One woman shared here amazing wave of orgasms after taking a muscle relaxer (for another reason). We’ll let her (adeepermystery on Reddit) tell the story. “So, I’ve always tensed my muscles when I’m trying to come. I hold my breath, as well, which is a hassle of a habit, but a hard one to break. Last night, I had just taken a Flexeril [a muscle relaxant] for a muscle spasm in my neck when I decided to take a little self-love time. I couldn’t tense my muscles as tight, and coming while they were relaxed felt incredible! I thought the whole point was to clench everything, then feel the release…but this was like wave after wave of beautiful feelings. I probably came five times, each more amazing than the last.” Yeah, we’re buying stock in Flexeril.

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MEET CHRISTMAS ABBOTT FIRST FEMALE NASCAR PITT CREW MEMBER

Christmas Abbott is 5’3″, and 115lbs. She is not exactly the girl you’d think would break one of the longest standing gender barriers for women: pit crew member for NASCAR. But that is exactly what she’s done recently. Christmas is 31-year-old, can squat 255lbs, and last week inked a deal to serve on a NASCAR pit crew in the Camping World Truck Series. She’ll change tires for driver Jennifer Jo Cobb, specifically she’ll have to whip around the No. 10 Ford with an air gun in hand, unbolt five lug nuts, rip a 60-pound tire off the car, bolt on a new one, then repeat it again on the other side all in about 12 seconds. Christmas is no stranger to hard work. She is a Head Trainer for CrossFit, opening her own gym in Raleigh, North Carolina in 2007. CrossFit is an intense workout that combines pull-ups, squats, sit-ups, lifting heavy balls with other sweat-inducing exercises. She is strong, and fit. Christmas was featured in Inked magazine late last year, for her muscle and tatts.


[Explicit Video: Nikki Benz, Can You Get Me Off? on Brazzers]


Christmas believes she is up to the challenge. “It’s that much of a challenge,” she says. “In pit crewing, even with the fatigue, you have to have the perfect precision to get the task done. You remember every tenth of every second. It’s that consistency of performance.” Her first assignment will be in Clint Bowyer’s pit for Sunday’s Daytona 500, where she’ll shadow the Michael Waltrip Racing crew. “I have to get dirty and [travel] overnight,” Abbott said about diving into a year-long Truck Series schedule. “NASCAR fans are die-hard and they will call out your B.S. I want to go to the highest level, and I left three jobs to do [this] one.” The hardest challenge for Christmas may be drilling the bolts on the tires after they’re on the wheel. Pros do it six times in 1.3 seconds. In a mock wheel-and-axle assembly station, Christmas did it in 1.7 seconds. Not bad. “There’s a lot of spotlight,” she says. “I prefer to be the quiet underdog.”







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