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TIGER WOODS THREATENS LAWSUITS OVER LEAKED NUDES, BUT THE DAMAGE IS ALREADY DONE, EVERYONE’S SEEN YOUR DICK TIGER

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In spite of the insanely huge free publicity, both Tiger Woods and Lindsey Vonn are incensed, according to reports, about the leak of their nude pictures. They are threatening to sue anybody, everybody who looks at Tiger’s massive dong or Lindsey’s tight pussy. Although Tiger and Lindsey split in May 2015, a hacker broke into Lindsey’s phone and found pictures of Tiger’s dick that Lindsey just couldn’t let go of. Her nudes were leaked all over the Internet. (They aren’t hard to find at all. A few of our Greek linking partners still have them up.) Kristen Stewart, Katharine McPhee, Miley Cyrus, and a host of lesser celebrities were caught up in this round of The Fappening. But this round saw a much more aggressive response from some of the celebrities. In a statement, Lindsey said, “It is an outrageous and despicable invasion of privacy for anyone to steal and illegally publish private intimate photos.” The statement continued: “Lindsey will take all necessary and appropriate legal action to protect and enforce her rights and interests. She believes the individuals responsible for hacking her private photos as well as the websites that encourage this detestable conduct should be prosecuted to the fullest extent under the law.” Ohh gawd, Lindsey, they’re just tits. And we’ve already seen your naked ass. (Since we haven’t gotten the okay from our lawyers to fight this fight, we are playing this one safe, but who knows tomorrow.)

sVONN8

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CHEYENNE WOODS IS RISING AS HER UNCLE TIGER FACES DUI PRISON TIME

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Tiger Woods’ career has been shit for some time now, almost a decade since his last major. The DUI arrest didn’t help. The horrible mug shot didn’t help. It’s almost over for Tiger. He should start thinking about his Dancing with the Stars routines. But there is a rising Woods in the wings. Cheyenne Woods, 26, his niece. She is is the daughter of Susan and Earl Woods, Jr., who is Tiger Woods’ half-brother. She was on Golf Magazine’s 2017 “Most Beautiful Women In Golf” list. She just qualified for the 2017 LPGA US Open for the second time. “12 hours and 36 holes later… We did it!! US Women’s Open bound! #golfmarathon #uswomensopen #medalist,” she posted on Instagram. We had to check her out further on Instagram. Yeah, we are interested in golf again.

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LINDSEY VONN GETS NAKED TO PROMOTE HER BOOK

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Lindsey Vonn tried to explain what her naked ass propped in the air has to do with the release of her new book, “Strong Is the New Beautiful,” but we couldn’t exactly make sense of it. She said on Instagram, “Well guys, it’s finally here! After a year and a half of hard work and a lot of personal growth, tomorrow my book will officially be sold in stores AND I’m starting my book tour! It’s taken me 31 years to finally be confident with my body and who i am, and I can’t wait to share this with you! Come see me in NYC on Tuesday if you’re in town… #StrongIsTheNewBeautiful @ Barnes & Noble Tribeca @ 6pm, 97 Warren St, New York, NY 10007”. We wonder whether she’ll be naked with her ass propped in the air. But maybe she’s not yet that confident.

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JOSLYN JAMES, TIGER’S MISTRESS, AT THE BUNNY RANCH

Porn star Joslyn James, known as much for being Mistress #8 on Tiger Woods’ list of affairs, is making an appearance at the Moonlite Bunny Ranch in Nevada, a famous (or infamous) legal brothel owned by Dennis Hof. The Bunny Rancy was made popular by the HBO Series on the ranch and its flamboyant owner, Dennis. Joslyn’s hot texts with Tiger exploded an already volatile and national affair. And as you can imagine, no one has passed up the opportunity to play up the Tiger angle for Joslyn’s December 5-12 appearance.


[Watch: Joslyn James, My Wife’s Hot Friend on Naughty America]


TMZ reports that she is “offering up her 3-hole course.” Dennis himself said “Now you can finally have a piece of Tiger’s tail.”




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