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EMILY LANCE MADE THE MISTAKE OF POSTING A VIDEO OF HERSELF PEEING ON AN AMERICAN FLAG IN A TOILET BOWL, AND AMERICANS DIDN’T REACT TOO KINDLY

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Emily Lance has to be about the dumbest dumb fuck on the planet. She posted a video on Facebook of herself urinating on an American flag draped over her toilet bowl. She used a funnel to get every drop perfectly splashed across the flag, while enabling her to stand over it, and of course serve as a pseudo dick. She really laid it on thick, entitling her post, “Fuck your nationalism. Fuck your country. Fuck your stupid fucking flag.” Emily’s from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, by the way. People didn’t like it of course. Emily, being the dumb fuck she is, didn’t care. “Freedom (of speech/expression) means that I’m entitled to do and say as I please, EVEN if you don’t like it, so long as I am not physically hurting someone,” she posted. “And no, your precious feelings don’t count, that’s your own problem.” Well, it’s become Emily’s problem, as she has received death and rape threats. (You knew it was coming.). Emily continued to lash out. “People are willing to MURDER someone over a flag. It’s so sad that people don’t realize how brainwashed they are,” she wrote. “I’m gross for peeing on a symbol? LOOK AT YOURSELVES. You people epitomize all that is foul.” Oh but ain’t that America, for you and me / Ain’t that America, we’re something to see baby / Ain’t that America, home of the free, yeah / Little pink houses for you and me, oh for you and me. Who doesn’t love John Cougar Mellencamp? And when you fuck with the American flag, yeah baby, you’re gonna get a taste of America. Emily has since deleted her Facebook post, but that ain’t never going away.

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PUTIN DEFENDS TRUMP, AND SAYS RUSSIAN PROSTITUTES ARE “THE BEST IN THE WORLD”

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By now you’ve probably heard a few things about the president-elect Donald Trump and Russia. The current administration believes that Russia interfered in the election on Donald’s behalf, though won’t go so far as saying that Russia gave Donald the election. Donald and Russian president Vladimir Putin have a cozy relationship that makes most people uncomfortable. And, as of late, that Donald likes prostitutes to pee on his bed, a golden shower fetish. It is not clear if that last one is true or not, so far we have not seen the alleged sex tape that a former British intelligence official claimed exists. Vladimir confirmed the second thing, coming to the defense of Donald about Urination-Gate. “People who order fakes of the type now circulating against the U.S. president-elect, who concoct them and use them in a political battle, are worse than prostitutes because they don’t have any moral boundaries at all. … It highlights a significant degree of degradation of political elites in the West, including in the United States,” Vladimir said, according to Bloomberg. And then we went on to say, after dismissing the allegations against Donald (that he hired Russian prostitutes to pee on a bed while he was in Moscow), “they are of course also the best in the world. But I doubt Trump took that bait.” Wait, how does Vladimir know? Sounds like he’s taken the bait, and sampled Russian prostitutes himself, cause they are “the best in the world” is a pretty strong endorsement. We can’t say about the Russian prostitutes, we aren’t as experienced as Vladimir, but the nude models are pretty hot.

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sRUSS1

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